The past year in law school, somehow, I've done / read a lot of stuff relating to domestic violence (DV). My first tryst with anything related to domestic violence was an internship at this place called Majlis, in Bombay. Majlis is an NGO fighting for women's rights in various spheres and was started by Flavia Agnes. It was a wonderful experience, and though it may sound cliched, the internship was an eye opener.
I then did a project on DV in Crim Law I. I also studied it in Family Law I. And roomie gifted a book, Strange Fits of Passion, by Anita Shreve, which is a wonderful insight into what goes through the mind of a victim. In the book, the central character is 'free' in the sense that she at any point does have the liberty to go to the police and report the case. So at times, while reading the book, you would ask yourself - why the hell isn't she doing that? However she is so terrorised of her husband (she keeps on saying, "He'll kill me") that she doesn't. She chooses to flee to another town with her baby and live incognito, but she doesn't report the case. I won't tell you how the book ends, but I would recommend it to you all (thankoo momo :)!).
Domestic violence cases are complex in the sense that they deal with something which happens behind closed doors. I've never come across anyone who I know personally and has been a victim - but something does need to be done about it. So this post is about the 'Bell Bajao' Campaign. Some of you might have seen the ad on TV, which in my opinion is a piece of brilliant advertising work(done by Ogilvy & Mather). Boman Irani's in his house, but he can hear shouts etc from a neighbouring house - one can make out that the woman is being battered. So he goes up to the house, rings the bell. There is silence. Then the man opens the house. And Irani asks, "Can I use your phone?". The man looks sheepish, very. And as far as I can remember, the ad ends. It goes without saying that the ad does have a lot more to it - visual impact etc is awesome :)
So well, while this does not suggest a long term solution obviously, I really think it's a nice innovative idea. To be honest, I've never done much of social work - have always been too lazy to take any kind of initiative. When I saw the ad though, I was really enthused. It's a nice idea which does not require much of one. As DV is a crime which happens inside the house, proving the same is difficult. With the advent of the Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act, the law has changed dramatically. Nonetheless I'm not too sure whether much has actually changed or not. Also while legal action is one option, a simple ringing of a bell, consequently making the abuser aware of the fact that everyone knows, an action which threatens and corners him and one which should ideally lead to a phone call to the cops, can change things. So I really do hope that I help. And would want you all to too!
The link of the campaign's website is -
http://www.bellbajao.org/index.php
Ok now time for my 'I like' thing. Ok currently, I like my birthday presents :D Birthday was on the 11th of this month, and got some really nice gifts from 'frands'. Sigh. I LOVE birthdays because of this! Yes I'm horribly materialistic and LOVE gifts :D Thank you so much to aforementioned frands and to everyone else for all the wishes (yes yes I LOVE them too, not that materialistic!)!
Showing posts with label gender. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gender. Show all posts
Must watch :)
No time to write more, too tired (just got back from work), but THIS (see below) is an AWESOME campaign. :)http://thepinkchaddicampaign.blogspot.com/
On travelling alone, related observations and some disconnected ones
So yesterday I travelled alone on a flight for the first time... yes I guess shocking when I'm 19 (a friend of mine was 6 when she travelled alone on a flight for the first time). Anyway it was an exhilirating feeling. I don't think it was about flying per se... it was more about the solitude and the 'alone' time. Some time ago I had been scared about being 'alone'... now I think I value the away time. Yesterday was a fun day! I window shopped at the airport (BIAL should get more shops in my opinion), had a sinful delight (a chocolate ice cream milk shake :D I'm not supposed to have milk, especially cold milk), sat at the terminal and read a book after the longest time (Atonement, by Ian McEwan, nice :)), watched Friends on the flight (Kingfisher! Ok i usually go home either by IndiGo or Spice, but this time this was the only flight at the convenient time :P), watched bits of Pardes and Shahrukh singing 'Yeh Dil...Deewana' (sigh), and ate chocolate cake (another forbidden fruit!), the rest of the food sucked. I loved it. There are so many million trillion zillion things one can do when one's alone, it's beautiful. I like things to be the way I want them to be, obviously. However when X and Y are also involved in whatever you're doing, you have to be nice and sensitive and mindful of what they think or what they want ... or you're being 'watched'! When one is alone one can do whatever one wants...... you're literally creating your own world, and hence you are responsible for whatever you do... it's a nice feeling :) I love being around people, some people... but I love my own private space too, behind closed doors, oblivious to the world.
Ok now for the other disconnected observations.
1. At BIAL (basically B'lore airport), when one is being frisked (the word has a certain criminal connotation to it, I agree) before one enters the check in area, there is only one entrance for women but some three for men. End result - women have to wait in the single queue for AGES while the men get in way faster. I think I've mentioned this somewhere else too, I'm not a hard core feminist (I don't know what I mean exactly by that... but still!).. however how blatantly gender biased can one get?! So the BIAL admin thinks that women don't travel?! SO weird! So that's the second suggestion for change on my part - make the no. of frisking counters equal for men and women!
2. Ok so I was frisked...and I cleared it, but my purse didn't. I was worried. I had kept a metal chain inside (the one with which one locks their luggage in a train), had forgotten to remove it, so it got confiscated. In the process however, the checking lady emptied the entire contents of my purse. I was SO embarrassed. It was as if a part of me was being exposed to the world - little slips of paper of great meaning, tiny trinkets which were gifts from friends, a comb, a hair band, two diaries and lots of other things which I wouldn't mention here, EVERYTHING was taken out! There's this saying - the eyes are the windows to one's soul. Well I would say, so is a woman's purse for her! I have this habit of collecting and keeping stuff (as a kid I was a like a little magpie, everything which seemed precious to my five year old self would go into my 'magic' box... so whenever my parents or brother lost something, they would never forget to check my box.. no I am not a thief now!).. I'm trying to discard things now, but it's slow process... so now my purse often replaces my magic box :)
3. The totally disconnected observation. Our Minority Affairs Min, Antulay is, to use a law school term, quite a 'prick'. By flouting conspiracy theories about the awesome cop Karkare's death, he's made a smooth move for himself. However it's jeopardising our anti-terrorism campaign and how. The Times of India has a column called 'The Pak Express' or some such thing - it basically chronicles news reports from Pakisatani newspapers like Dawn. So today I read the column - and these newspapers are questioning India's locus standi vis-a-vis pointing fingers at Pak for its failure to ban the terrorist outfits in their backyard. There's this one newspaper which is questioning India's 'secular' credentials (the conspiracy theory is that Karkare - who was investigating the Malegaon blasts, allegedly carried out by Hindutva organisations - was deliberately taken to the wrong hospital or some such thing, and this was rigged by the aforementioned orgs). I agree that India is not the most secular state - the Godhra riots are the biggest testimony to that. Nonetheless, there is always a time for saying some things. In my opinion, given the gravity of the Mumbai blasts (horrific, depressing, devastating... words are not enough to describe them) India needs to adopt a hardline stance towards curbing terrorism. Given this, when a Union Min comes forth and says that not Pak but an Indian outfit is responsible for the super cop's death, it's a clear breach of the idea of collective responsibility. Yes the theory needs to be investigated, but it can be done discreetly initially. And it's not as if the man really cares for the minorities. As MJ Akbar's written in this artice in the Sunday Times, the man has the unique distinction of being the first Union Min Affairs min who has done nothing for minorities. For Antulay, it's about pure vote bank politics and self aggrandisation. He's himself said in an interview that before this he was nothing, and now he's all important. Congress has to think twice before they can remove hm because he claims that the minorities love him. It's a well planned move. Smart, slick and sick.
Ok now for the other disconnected observations.
1. At BIAL (basically B'lore airport), when one is being frisked (the word has a certain criminal connotation to it, I agree) before one enters the check in area, there is only one entrance for women but some three for men. End result - women have to wait in the single queue for AGES while the men get in way faster. I think I've mentioned this somewhere else too, I'm not a hard core feminist (I don't know what I mean exactly by that... but still!).. however how blatantly gender biased can one get?! So the BIAL admin thinks that women don't travel?! SO weird! So that's the second suggestion for change on my part - make the no. of frisking counters equal for men and women!
2. Ok so I was frisked...and I cleared it, but my purse didn't. I was worried. I had kept a metal chain inside (the one with which one locks their luggage in a train), had forgotten to remove it, so it got confiscated. In the process however, the checking lady emptied the entire contents of my purse. I was SO embarrassed. It was as if a part of me was being exposed to the world - little slips of paper of great meaning, tiny trinkets which were gifts from friends, a comb, a hair band, two diaries and lots of other things which I wouldn't mention here, EVERYTHING was taken out! There's this saying - the eyes are the windows to one's soul. Well I would say, so is a woman's purse for her! I have this habit of collecting and keeping stuff (as a kid I was a like a little magpie, everything which seemed precious to my five year old self would go into my 'magic' box... so whenever my parents or brother lost something, they would never forget to check my box.. no I am not a thief now!).. I'm trying to discard things now, but it's slow process... so now my purse often replaces my magic box :)
3. The totally disconnected observation. Our Minority Affairs Min, Antulay is, to use a law school term, quite a 'prick'. By flouting conspiracy theories about the awesome cop Karkare's death, he's made a smooth move for himself. However it's jeopardising our anti-terrorism campaign and how. The Times of India has a column called 'The Pak Express' or some such thing - it basically chronicles news reports from Pakisatani newspapers like Dawn. So today I read the column - and these newspapers are questioning India's locus standi vis-a-vis pointing fingers at Pak for its failure to ban the terrorist outfits in their backyard. There's this one newspaper which is questioning India's 'secular' credentials (the conspiracy theory is that Karkare - who was investigating the Malegaon blasts, allegedly carried out by Hindutva organisations - was deliberately taken to the wrong hospital or some such thing, and this was rigged by the aforementioned orgs). I agree that India is not the most secular state - the Godhra riots are the biggest testimony to that. Nonetheless, there is always a time for saying some things. In my opinion, given the gravity of the Mumbai blasts (horrific, depressing, devastating... words are not enough to describe them) India needs to adopt a hardline stance towards curbing terrorism. Given this, when a Union Min comes forth and says that not Pak but an Indian outfit is responsible for the super cop's death, it's a clear breach of the idea of collective responsibility. Yes the theory needs to be investigated, but it can be done discreetly initially. And it's not as if the man really cares for the minorities. As MJ Akbar's written in this artice in the Sunday Times, the man has the unique distinction of being the first Union Min Affairs min who has done nothing for minorities. For Antulay, it's about pure vote bank politics and self aggrandisation. He's himself said in an interview that before this he was nothing, and now he's all important. Congress has to think twice before they can remove hm because he claims that the minorities love him. It's a well planned move. Smart, slick and sick.
